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When community becomes “Survivor”





Our house of community goes through cycles. There are times when it is easy to love, and there are times when it is difficult to love one another. And then there is a phase of those cycles that I like to call “when community becomes ‘Survivor’.”

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Suddenly, the 10 or more people living in one house begin sectioning off. They turn into what some would call “cliques” and what I like to call “alliances.” It could be for any reason really.

I like these people more than the rest. They are my friends.
Those people bug me so I just won’t hang around them.
She doesn’t really have any friends so I’ll be her friend.

Being closer to certain people over other people is not the issue. The issue is when these factions begin to turn on one another. When they begin to agree that another person or group of people is annoying or frustrating to deal with.

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The other thing that begins to manifest in Community Survivor is gossip. Every reality TV show has that side video camera that people can go to and complain or tell secrets to.

(whispering) That person drives me crazy when he does that! Who does he think he is???
(blank expression) I don’t know what these people’s problem is… I just live here.
(angry) I have no idea why I signed up for this! I hate doing chores and living with other people!

In Simple House, we do not have a “tell your secrets to…” camera. Praise God we don’t. However, like every community, within those “alliances,” gossip has a tendency to creep in. We will complain to other people about the issues we have with another, instead of going to that person and dealing with the issue. It’s a lot easier to stay frustrated, build walls around your heart and justify your feelings by getting others to agree with you, than to choose to love.

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Solutions to cure Community Survivor…

-Realize that the very person who is annoying you the most is a chisel that God has put in your life to chip away parts of you that don’t belong, for example, selfishness, pride, aggression.

-Make a point to break down the walls of your heart against people who are your brothers and sisters and choose to love and serve and “go low.”

-Go to the people who you think have issue with you and ask what you have done to offend them. Then work out the miscommunication, misunderstanding, or issue, and ask for forgiveness. Jesus made this clear that God demands this. (Matthew 5:23-24).

Christian community, in whatever context, is NEVER Survivor. It should never be Survivor. We should be encouraging one another and building each other up. We should put others before ourselves. We should serve and love as Jesus loves. Relationships should never be sacrificed in order to preserve pride.

Out-serve, Out-love, Out-give.

Comments

Victoria said…
good post. "get low" -I like that.
:)
September 19, 2011 at 12:06 PM
Rachel Apple said…
Out-serve, Out-love, Out-give. LOVE IT! :)
September 19, 2011 at 7:43 PM
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